Je t’en prie

Learnt a new French phrase while reading a book about a gentleman in Moscow. I like the sound of this better than the usual de rien.

Easy switch

A friend1 recently mentioned how many of our old acquaintances self identify as libertarians, and how comfortable many of them are with authoritarianism.

In my head, this played out as…

I’m smarter than you, don’t tell me what to do, how to live. (Libertarian)

…turns easily into…

I’m smarter than you, I will tell you what to do, how to live. (Authoritarian)

Of course, there’s a big execution gap between telling people what to do, and forcing people to do it. In other words, between being an armchair authoritarian and the real one chaining up the country. Supporting the real one provides a comfortable bridge over that gap.


  1. The friend is an IIT-IIM grad. The acquaintances are all IIM, if not IIT-IIM grads. Perhaps the superior status signalling provided by these institutions is a trigger for the “I’m smarter than you…” base that leads to the two isms. 

Faith. Blind?

Parents are shit scared. They realise how bad is the situation. Their network is full of infected and suffering people. They’ve lost friends and acquaintances. They will not hear one word against the God or his organisation.

Friends are shit scared. They’ve suffered and recovered. Their parents and siblings are infected but stable. They’re scared, not of Covid, but of the God who demands and commands this blind loyalty. They’re scared of what’s happening to the nation, the society, and their future and safety in it.

I fear for both.

I’m sad that I’m so far from both.

Is it melancholy?

Second night of insomnia and anxiety. Too much change. Missing Maisie. Missing Bruno. Missing my daffodils at bottom of the drive flower bed. Missing my chocolate and chili begonias. Missing my house number sign. Missing my rustic, old but trusty, clay brick driveway. Missing the beloved, if aged, civic. Missing parents. Missing an India I wanted to go back to. Missing the old house. Missing dad’s shop. Missing Bombay. Missing Goa.

Not liking the new India. Not liking parents’ new neighbourhood. Not liking the new car’s blazing red colour. Not liking the scope creeping driveway contractor. Not liking suppressing suggestions and feedback at work to keep the peace.

Not happy that it’s too hot for a duvet and too cold for no duvet. Not happy about my weight. Not happy about the lack of running. Not happy about all the chocolate. Not happy that I haven’t worked on my apps in months. Not happy that I’ve been watching too much TV, and reading too little.