That feeling of impending disaster didn’t go all day. Wasn’t good at work. Wasn’t good at anything. It just kept eating inside.
It didn’t help that tinnitus is bad, haven’t been able to speak to parents, and I won’t ever see Bruno again after tomorrow.
Finished watching ‘A star is born’ just now. It was so good. Then he killed himself. And left the dog alone.
I hate movies with sad endings. My life is hard enough as it is, I want happy feels, not sad endings. I really really hate great movies with sad endings. I should’ve stopped watching with 30 mins to go when R asked me to.
I admired how they touched on tinnitus and mental health. People without tinnitus just don’t understand what it is to live with this constant fucking buzz inside the head all the time! There’s no off switch. It can’t be drowned out. The best I can do is to get the head full of other shit so I don’t have the mental capacity to cater to the noise. That’s one reason why I work long hours.
It’s not the first Bradley Cooper movie I’ve liked. It’s the first time I’ve heard anything by Lady Gaga, and definitely the first time I’ve seen her. She is brilliant. I might check out some of her songs now.
Speaking of Bradley Cooper, Silver Lining Playbook may be a good antidote to this sad movie. It’s late though, and we’ve got to drive to Nottingham tomorrow to say bye to Bruno. So should I watch the movie or start reading the book?
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